Third Time Lucky

Just a short one this week as another blast of the super poisons take grip of me - but some good things to mention so just wanted to get it down.

Having refused all company during chemo up until now - my old friend Hayley popped in from her Pilates instructor classes (yes, she does have a flatter stomach than a 12 year old) bearing a bag of super Clarins goodies (thanks also to Dorothy!!!) and her lap top which she'd lugged all the way in from East Sussex....so while Gladys the gorgeous nurse was trying to find a vein to stick her canula in, I gazed at Oxley family photos of their fab summer holiday in Montana. Not only did I not feel a thing, but I now associate the process with breathtaking scenes of pine studded mountains and glistening lakes with a couple of bears and coyotes thrown in. Montana just skittled up to the top of my list of 'places I will visit when I am better' list.

The only worrying point was when they weighed me before giving the drugs. Twice. They couldn't believe I'd actually put on weight since the last time ????? (This is obviously my punishment for that fleeting moment when I thought - Cancer - oh well - at least I'll lose a stone... ) I blame the chemo caterers....

On Sunday it was my 44th birthday - great timing - but the extra steroids they dished out this time meant the whole day was not a total write off - I made it down to lunch and was inundated with cards and presents - the most unexpected of which was from my family who had clubbed together and got me a fantastic white sony laptop!!! So no excuse for not blogging even while bedbound - although I admit to not so far having the energy to actually open it - but plan to get onto that soon...

And finally - and the best bit - while in hospital last week, consultant oncologist/human dynamo Dr Plowman had another grope (I'm sure it's all an excuse...) and declared joyfully that the lump was much smaller and reacting brilliantly to his wonder drugs...he has therefore packed me off for an ultrasound tomorrow to see where we are and a visit to the surgeon next week to see whether surgery may be brought forward. Either way -I'll still need 6 chemo in total - which makes me half way there now. The last time I was in that scan room I had such bad news I can't bear to think about it. I am trying not to drive myself mad wondering what 'smaller' actually means - will have to wait until Tuesday to get the full picture, and stay away from rulers.

Anyway - having expected very little - this birthday week has been full of surprises...

PS. Thanks to everyone who sent me cards and presents etc etc this week - I am starting to feel like Victoria Beckham - and Martina - I don't have your email address or new phone number - the flowers are gorgeous!!!! Thank you....